LiberTango

2005-11-18T17:53:00.000+08:00

I wonder how does it feel to be betrayed, in a sense. It's repugnant, and saddening.

2005-11-08T14:29:00.000+08:00

Perhaps you don't know, I don't mean it anymore. I've waited for too long and it's hurting me. I hate hurting myself, so don't force me.

2005-07-02T19:51:00.000+08:00

You know the one thing about music is that though practise is allegedly supposed to make it perfect, but not perfect all the time.

After hours of dazzling practice and having seemingly reached the realm of perfection, there are times (many times) when things just don't piece together the way you'd wish. Prodigies aside, more average humanbeans like me have been often reported to encounter "screw-ups". It's a moment of anguish and disbelief when whatever you've achieved just simply eludes your beckoning, faraway, non-existent.

During exams, performances, even lessons - as long as pairs of eyes other than your own are casting a casual glance at you, you lose it. That's the case for me I suppose, sadly and helplessly I resign to my fate, and attempt to compensate by extra practice which of course, doesn't necessarily pay off.

Okok, modulation from that stupid shame of mine. The HCI internal syf showcase was hilarious, right gloria? The band doesn't even house a single oboe nor a bassoon! I might call that a blasphemy to the family of woodwinds. And the problem with winds and brass is that they fail to move to the music, rather content with their ramrod straight posture while inhaling reservedly into their mouthpieces. Perhaps the drama center stage is too cramped for these otherwise excellent musicians to shine through, and not to mention a certain someone who wears white gloves while playing the french horn =) The overall atmosphere ends up very stiff and polite, like a bunch of aristocratic sight-readers.

The conductor of the string orch is... haha. A tad plump on the lower body. Gosh, no offence intended but trevor should take pride in his counterpart. The whole programme is at best stifling, apart from the shostakovich 2nd move which I love loads. Following, silver-medalist English drama presented a rather comical play (but under-developed in plot and lacking just a bit of x-factor.)

Somehow, I feel obliged to take care of my rancid homework. Suddenly have an urge to go back to the 1940s Shanghai and become a xiaojie in one of those old mansions, with a few stepmothers wagging around and tons of nerdy brothers. The image just strikes me dumb.

2005-06-23T22:38:00.000+08:00

So holidays are going to snap shut in three days time. How comforting, I can't bear to reset my alarm clock to that painful 5.55am. (5 mins for me lagging in bed) O.K. Forget about it, I've learnt to go with the flow and fit into the system rather than perpetually sticking out like a sore thumb.

I like my holidays, seriously. It's not perfect, not that type of dream vacation in Swiss or Honolulu (bikini galore!)but it has been fulfilling anyways. How hopelessly stupid and selfish have I been in trying to elope with the responsibility to play in FOA! Now I'm addicted to full orchestra pracs and the seductively bouncy sound of the bassoon. At last I can identify the diff timbre of the wind instruments, which I had always miserably failed in my HMP days. No wonder Vivian gongong can chicken-feetedly tell the sounds apart, Weezer! =) Btw Vivian's hair is cool. I love sexy curls. What pity that I only possess shreddy layered brownish hair.

Dunman High's Copland piece is cool man. Hybrid of true americanish tunes and alludes to scottish country dances, with sticky syncopation which I've given up on. But the RI rendition of Suk is still my first take, period.

(clears vomit) Sze kept a pet baby snake! SNAKE! and force fed it chicken breast and new-born baby mice. I need to clear my earwax, definitely. No kidding, and I've got to attend to my baby flea soon, for it might have given birth, after blogging this. ^^

Should I take music in JC? Got lambasted by my piano teacher today again for having given up on Music when I could have chucked Japanese or taken on both and efficiently suffocated inside. Ok, truth be told, I'm (mildly) jealous at shunhong being able to play that appasionata thingy. I must be able to do something on par with that lor! Chopin Ballade and Rachmaninov prelude, I've henceforth decided =)

It could have been a dream, for it is still one. And I'm glad to live in it. Be with me and renew my faith everyday, be with me.

2005-06-23T22:15:00.000+08:00

So holidays are going to snap shut in three days time. How comforting, I can't bear to reset my alarm clock to that painful 5.55am. (5 mins for me lagging in bed) O.K. Forget about it, I've learnt to go with the flow and fit into the system rather than perpetually sticking out like a sore thumb.

I like my holidays, seriously. It's not perfect, not that type of dream vacation in Swiss or Honolulu (bikini galore!)but it has been fulfilling anyways. How hopelessly stupid and selfish have I been in trying to elope with the responsibility to play in FOA! Now I'm addicted to full orchestra pracs and the seductively bouncy sound of the bassoon. At last I can identify the diff timbre of the wind instruments, which I had always miserably failed in my HMP days. No wonder Vivian gongong can chicken-feetedly tell the sounds apart, Weezer! =) Btw Vivian's hair is cool. I love sexy curls. What pity that I only possess shreddy layered brownish hair.

Dunman High's Copland piece is cool man. Hybrid of true americanish tunes and alludes to scottish country dances, with sticky syncopation which I've given up on. But the RI rendition of Suk is still my first take, period.

(clears vomit) Sze kept a pet baby snake! SNAKE! and force fed it chicken breast and new-born baby mice. I need to clear my earwax, definitely. No kidding, and I've got to attend to my baby flea soon, for it might have given birth, after blogging this. ^^

Should I take music in JC? Got lambasted by my piano teacher today again for having given up on Music when I could have chucked Japanese or taken on both and suffocating inside. Ok, truth be told, I'm (mildly) jealous at shunhong being able to play that appasionata thingy. I must be able to do something on par with that lor! Chopin Ballade and Rachmaninov prelude, I've henceforth decided =)

It could have been a dream, for it is still one. And I'm glad to live in it. Be with me and renew my faith everyday, be with me.

2005-06-13T22:20:00.000+08:00

I shall hereby assume the role of a highly stimulated regurgitating machine and thereafter perform the task of recounting a day's events. (My first try at this kinda entry, so don't expect any linguistics.)

We had our NYSE camp today, much to our chagrin, it was after all a day camp. Bye to all those wistful scheming of nightgames and horror flicks and classroom cockroach attacks.

The whole morning was devoted to inter-groups station games, and our 5 dear facilitators-turned-slackers - Yi/Li-bing, Priscilla, Percy Archer and me, yes you've guessed it - SLACKED. Muahaha, I love the music room bathed in the cool air of vrooming air-cons paired with that ever so seductive Yamaha babygrand.

Uh-oh. I suddenly unearthed from my jumbled mind that I have to air some juicy gossips here: Tan Li Bing and Nicolson Ng Bo wen are officially an item! An item, a single item, and imagine the intimacy involved duds =) Give some whoots, catcalls, dogyelps, whatever that's in you to congratulate our new sweethearts! Muahaha, I feel so evil. I shouldn't be the only one who's constantly abash with scathing rumours, hor?

As I've always been kinda lackin in the nourishment of fresh gossips somehow, some people may find this declaration of union quite passe. Oh well, this is for those who don't yet know, or ain't quite sure.

Alrighto, back on track. So XiangjunPeiying&Mengtian went to sixth ave on our old ye faithful callused feet during lunchbreak. I'm sorta used to scaling mountains and crossing rivers to find edibles nowadays. So...COFFEEBEAN&TEALEAF! (the tealeaf part is quite redundant lah.)And thanks to the art of care and share, I got my share of iceblended at 3 bucks. Hehe, and we made a helluva amount of screechy girly voices which seriously traumatised the customers and waiteresses there. Oh man, my darling langlang I'm so in love with you! See, I'm bimbo. Or rather in a more elegant manner, BIMBI =)

Sheet-o-rama. I don't feel like blogging liao, muaboohoo! Ok, since my summary skills have been in the doldrums all the while, i shall henceforce attempt to sharpen it in the last sentence of my entry.

We practised ZauberfloteChavarriReineckeSuk and played a adrenalinepumped game devised by none other than our dear beloved? conductor.

Argh. I failed. I must add sommore verbatim here. "Suk and SYF pieces sounds as nice as hyenas chasing flying mozzie larvae." - Mengtian. Oh I forgot to mention that mel-gong-gong is so pro and cute! SO CUTE! =)=)=)

2005-06-09T19:19:00.000+08:00

Urgh, don't feel like blogging again. But shall at least report my scruffy doings for the past dunno how many days.

SIA execution is nearly slowing to a halt, not that the no. of convicts have decreased, but more like the executioner is bored.

Watched Jet Li's Unleashed, he has proudly become my new idol. I nearly cried when that perverted fat botak old hag shoved him around like a dog, locking him up in lightless dungeons after fight after fight, while having major fun grabbing g-strings off new babes everyday. Perverted.

Anyways Jet Li's Kungfu is utterly incredible. I don't care about whatever special effects that may have been injected but he's one TRUE martial fanatic. Love him =) Morgan Freeman's acting skills as a piano tuner is admirable too, perhaps I'm just biased at the very mention of piano, muahaha.

Musically educated girls will NOT be prostitutes, hear that.

Love Esplanade too, met Benson Chua sashaying through Citylink Mall, he's quite petite but adorable anyways.

Met Jason Ingham too, he stared inquiringly at me for like 4 seconds but I preferred not to socialise with teachers that moment so I just strutted into a nearby shoppe. Phew. Argh, speaking of Ingham, Seow Hwee is leaving... Boohoo ='(

After a sudden epiphany on Monday, I've decided to re-take-up my piano lessons. Phoned Miss Sim and told her I miss her like siao. She jovially asked me why did i play truant for 6 months, after which we reconcilled! Sob. Oh well lessons starts next week still at my beloved NAFA, so I'd better be off preparing that sickly seductive Rachmaninov prelude I've been slaving on intermittently.

Feel so sorry for my cello, I'm just too lousy to be motivated. Anyways muacks to a certain somebody x)

2005-06-04T23:20:00.000+08:00

Why am I such a two-faced wimp? This damned dilemma has to end, I don't even know what made me say such things. Such contradicting statements. Do I want to live in a lie? Why can't I just strip off my damned facade and live like a real, blameless Man?

Yeah It's Like That. I love conflicts. Internal ones.

Sweet, sweet conflicts.

2005-05-28T17:14:00.000+08:00

Holidays are just unfolding, and I'm already losing touch, directionless and lethargic as usual.

Nowadays I'm constantly having affairs of the heart, and realising that in a flurry to know more about the outside world, I've neglected my inner spectrum.

"I don't understand myself. YET." the stock excuse is becoming annoyingly feeble. I never seem to be getting a grip on myself.

Talked with Mrs Ho and Satay, they think highly of my results this term and reckon I'm too harsh on myself, comparing my everything with others who are better, and end up miserable.

I took a look at my marks, as usual, I'm disturbingly average with everything. I've told myself countless times that I've got to have a thing or two to be exceptionally good in since sec 1 when my flood of average marks actually managed to secure me a undeserved 1st position.

Freak. I again eluded myself in discovering my passion. None at all, everything is a duty, a burden to me, perhaps I've lost my zest of life.

True enough I may not know about other ppl's woes and limitations, and I shouldn't be making hasty judgement about them upon seeing only a few facets. I just can't seem to grasp a sense of inner contentment, I blame myself, I blame others, I've got a despicable personality to pair with my arrested intellect. What more am I looking for!~ All the SHIT in the world is pile high up on my plate. Shit is my staple.

At this rate I'm never going to be different, and respected. I'm a nobody, perhaps a joker, lost in the never-ending tide of time. I can't picture myself several years later, whether still stuck in the search for self identity, or have already found it, or whatever. I just can't picture it. I'll just naive my way through life, contend myself with superficiality.

Don't blame me for being superficial, for I simply can't find the deeper side of me.

2005-05-06T21:35:00.000+08:00

I'm transmogrifying into a horrid compulsive workaholic.

The slightest wastage of time renders me utterly petrified and laden with a thick layer of clingy guilt.

Like the absence of a test next day will make me feel unfulfilled.

Next week is a week of languages, and I'm proud to be ineffectively tri-lingual =)

Talk about "BUSYNESS" man.

Anyways flopped into cineleisure to watch Orlando's Kingdom Of Heaven today. Utter gore and at least 200 gallons of blood-spill. Beheading is a breeze, and the naked face of a leper - allow the grotesqueness to sink in.

On the other hand, Orlando's acting capacity has widened slightly and impressed me with his ostensibly rippling muscles. unmistakable resemblance to Troy-class of films whereby enemy troops station their bums outside the castle containing wimpy civilians and the HERO, attempting to push lighthouse like structures to the walls to assist in the bulk delivering of men into the fortress. Oh well.

Perhaps I should go back to untangling the seductive myth of Integration and applications. Yeah, I shall do that.

"What's the use of a woman when she can't bring good to the world?"

2005-05-02T14:44:00.000+08:00

The Idealist

You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world.

Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships.

It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close.

But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.

You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

What's Your Personality Type?

2005-05-01T21:40:00.000+08:00

*A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory*

2005-04-27T21:50:00.000+08:00

BRAVO NYSE!

I can't say anything anymore. The feeling's just way over words.

All the apprehension, uncertainty, insecurity is duly transformed into ecstacy and uncontrollable sweet sorrow.

We've proved ourselves not to be some "not-important cca" as Adrian Chan has foolishly declared. Yes, we were like nobodys. Nobodys who work damn hard and focused, away from the limelight and manage to make it there unto the center stage. (In the meantime, he'd better do some reflections and plead guilty) RISE standard does not seem so unreachable anymore, though they are still decidedly a notch above us.

The feeling of being on top of this world just so freakin good =)

2005-04-26T20:15:00.001+08:00

Music is such sweet sorrow.

So many hours of gruelling practise transform into that few glorious/disastrous moments.

Then it's over.

I hope for everything, yet I've got nothing to hope for. Tis not a deliberate paradox.

So many moments that I long to relive. I long.

Listen to me, with me.

2005-04-24T14:02:00.000+08:00

I'm Ready To Revamp My Life.

I need a High Class life.

which starts with Coffeebean Ice Blended™ =)

Funny, I've taken a liking for derri-holes and stretch marks.

And certainly my iPod m i n i

2005-04-22T21:41:00.000+08:00

C'est La Vie.

I'm getting hunked up by yarn-balls of work unravelling their ugly insides at me. They'll taunt and grin pruriently at me until I look at them placidly. Moral of the story? Heck with morals, I've got my own desire and intuitions to stick to. Just not in the mood for certain dreary love-making with stigmas and stamens and the akin on the notebook with highlighers.

Tiramisu's designed to revolt the entrails of humans like me. The chokingly thick odour of some wormy cheese stings away at my taste glands, relentless to be appreciated. Also downed some containerful of icky squidish substance unwittingly in front of the computer, not that it matters but demonstrates how screwed my life is.

How I wish I could just get over with it, SYF and all. Perhaps I'm over-reacting, but I'm unstable, feel poisoned.

I'm starved. fulfill my desire lest I crumble.

2005-04-15T19:09:00.000+08:00

Overwhelmed by my utmost good blessing: a Math test that I can actually DO! W/O lumps and bumps and freakin' mental lapses which indicate mild retardedness!

Really, SYF is a killer. The brutal doses of injustice that it has brought to some of my lovely schoolmates urges me to sprout nasty swear words. The utter un-transparent nature of the whole crummy affair creates the perfect breeding ground for dark manipulation and puke-inducing biasedness. You don't even get the reason why you're marked down; alas the purpose of the mere existence of the fakey assessment criteria remains an enigma.

Perhaps our humble String Ensemble shouldn't feed on high fantasies, no matter how splendid we may sound, how flooded with pride we are of how far we've come by. The element of unexpectancy will be too unbearable for our brittle hearts. In the meantime, there can be miracles when you believe!

On the side note, Raffles Institution, Singapore proved to be a interesting place that bears uncanny resemblance to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Dungeons and secret openings, classy. (As for all ye faithful inhabitants of this amazing abode I shall not currently succumb to dish out any comments, after all peripheral judgements do no one good.)

2005-03-31T22:16:00.000+08:00

Call it the excitement of preliminary specialisation: we are temporarily plucked out of a stupor of mugging, and offered the deliciously troubling choice of subject combination of the year 2006. Talks about future ambitions erupted from our mundane, gamesome activities of everyday life; a blissful escapade into a glimpse of ourselves sporting various professions.

T'was timely, and shrewd distraction. Seemingly paving way for our future endeavors whilst bucketfuls of unruly assessments lurk in nearer future. Of what use would that carefully deliberated series of subjects be? I would like to think very much that it won't be the final decision, and reserved room for fickleness and rashness.

I had not henceforth comtemplated much, Economics - English Lit - Mathematics - Biology - Chemistry - GP shall currently suit my liking.

2005-03-25T12:08:00.000+08:00

Pia-ing my bum off. My life is so so so lovely! =) At least church-going provides me with temporary solace.

Btw, SYF is really getting on my neurones, making my synapses collapse. Bestow me with a dose of tranquilizer, lest hyperventilation and angst rule my life. I don't feel like bad-mouthing any human beans, but this you-know-who should really promptly enrol himself into a temper re-assignment concentration camp ='(

2005-03-13T13:59:00.000+08:00

They say : A picture speaks a thousand words. Here goes a few dozens of pictures, do your math hor! =) Prom Promo - 2005 prom pics

2005-03-07T23:04:00.000+08:00

Just some insignificant updates to make my itching fingers satisfy their desire for some punching action : though the blog is apparently dead, the creator has not yet succumbed to RIP. Do not attempt sending in flower wreaths (yet), especially made from my favorite of lily, utter insult - mind you.

I don't like green iPod minis. Why? I don't have 'em. For now, anything that I can't lay my insatiable paws on - I don't like. Wait, there's supposed to be an apt Chinese idiom for it, but I conveniently forgot.

2004-12-31T18:45:00.000+08:00

Yawn. Another year has dusted its bum and scrambled away into slivers of wistful smoke. I'm SO excited, as you can see.

Mouldy Sec Fours are probably going to suffer the fate of being stuffed into the dingy Science Block to tolerate NH3 and whatnots. Really, Secondary 4. What a relevation, I think I need a Botox jab. (from the aging) I can't face the class, I don't quite belong there already. ='(

Anyways Happy New Year to everyone! (Do I sound as though I mean it? Just a cliche ritual, really. Most of the things would probably turn out exactly the opposite as you have fervently hoped for, but really that's where the seduction of life lies.)

2004-12-23T13:03:00.000+08:00

This is one minxy chick. Tamed at last in her sleep =) fig 1.1

Just a few more words on the character of the day (refer to fig 1.1). The character that you are currently gawking/drooling/scowling at is undeniably the hottest chick available in town. Known for her erm, rather humble b**** which are often "milked dry" to her delight, she has a way with hypnotizing soft lil girls and boys. (insiders' info not suitable to be aired here, beg your pardon.)

(refer to fig 1.1) as seen from solid evidence, she has single-handedly rendered TWO girls captive over the night =) See what I mean? The innermost lil lady is even shielding her lovely face to prevent excessive exposure to light, or rather, public scrutiny. One must note that at the scene of the crime, about a hefty crowd of 10 other witnesses are in the room. This is NOT a fabrication.

Well, enough said.

Oh, before I skivvy off to wonderland, here are some sincere insights from the insider -
Don't Smile.
Right to the dumpster with those "a smile makes your day", "a smile goes a thousand miles", "smiles chase all your woes away" fermented crap. Friggin' old wives' tale, period. A smile, does NOTHING - but to stretch your puny facial muscles to the utmost limit. (have you not wondered why old fellows get those unsightly saggy crevices near their once full and pouty mouths?)

A smile is the most superficial thing that you can ever unearth from this earth. It is often used to

1. Cover up guilt-infested faces; 2. Create a unprofessional illusion of a happy image; 3. cheat oneself that he/she is happy; 4. flirt; 5. exercise (rather speed up the dis-integration of) facial muscles.

So, don't you go around wearing NOTHING but a smile, thinkin' that you are oh-ever-so-wonderful. (=

2004-12-10T18:37:00.000+08:00

Since the year is coming to a grand closure might as well tally my movie repertoire of the year 2004. The invention of movie/film-making should register in the Richter Scale, period.

1. Hellboy - what the hell!
2. Troy - lovely beyond imagination, if you have any, that is.
3. Hairy Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - a SIRIUS disappointment.
4. Alien vs Predator - someone wipe away the goo leh.
5. Princess Diaries(royal engagement) - no effect detected
6. The Incredibles - Gorgeous!
7. Shutter - shut your eyes and ears to survive this blood-curdling daymare.
8. Polar Express - Will be better if Tom hanks appear in person.

That's about it, kinda sad but I really made horrendous efforts to sneak thru a NC 16 flick but failed to me and Helen's utter dismay. Nevertheless the prospect of turning 16 hangs like poisonous gas - I'm getting OLD! (relativity, folks.)

2004-11-30T16:04:00.000+08:00

Die die die now.

My goodness. such cuteness is not to be tolerated here!

Argh! *desperately squeezes his cheeks*

History repeats itself. It can't be any truer.

YAHOoOoO! Get moi the Whiskey! I seriously need a shot to heighten my utter pleasure (of losing to Ah Bei and Nicolson Ng bowen -> aristocratic name, eh?) Nevertheless, indignancy floods at the thought of my lousy viva voce grade, and the countless bucks spent on getting Beefy Beethoven's soppy life straight. So much for the illegally photocopied Grove Dictionary too.

While I'm at the rare event of updating the blog, might as well list my future career possibilities here, open for discussion and advice, if any.

10. Economist/politician
9. author/poet (who am I kiddin' :s)
8. Successor de Steven Spielberg.
7. Teacher (jeez, like I have the thing for squealing kids/angsty teens)
6. Piano teacher! (for G1, 2, 3)
5. Architect (drool, drool)
4. Translater
3. Photographer
2. Musician (realise that I've been kiddin myself a lot lately, no?)
1. Doctor (great. Here I come, thick bio books.)

2004-11-23T19:42:00.000+08:00

Empty your measly savings guys! Taufik
OUGHT to scrunch up that SLY chunk of sacharrine smile dispenser armed with the squeaky voice of teenage-girls-seducer. I could not stress enough that you should snap your bum outta of its miserable stupor right this sec and act to save the day, it's NOW or NEVER! Stop sitting atop the couch like a fermented egg-plant gawking at Taufik, VOTE! VOTE!

2004-11-19T09:43:00.000+08:00

les Incredibles.

Go and watch this one, you are warned. Especially good for pple who can't seem to snap out of the China stupor in a short time frame. Yes, I mean you.

*

The 1st para is for myself, the 2nd for the omniscient, blog-reading God.

YES!
I am VAIN, I am EGOCENTRIC, I am an "attention seeking brat", but so what? so what? WHO ISN'T!?! YES, I lie, artful liar, but I don't lie to maliciously, malevolently, blatantly hurt other people. I lie for fun or to get myself out of devil's shoes. And I DON'T BACKSTAB. I DON'T sprout heinous, vile stuff behind people's back.

... Sorry for all those threadbare excuses. Forgive me, will you?

2004-11-12T14:38:00.000+08:00

Memo to all employees:

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T).We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else.If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top ofthe S.H.I.T list and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S.H.I.T you can handle. Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T). Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already. If you are full of S.H.I.T you may be interested in a job teaching others.We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T). For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T). This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OFTEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).

Thank you, BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)

P.S.
Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T. They have already had their fill of S.H.I.T. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training.
(The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T).

Eventful Day
Alas, yesterday was a roller coaster of thrills, that blasted through my rusting life.

Other day highlights include a Roxy Bikini Scandal at Heeren surfwear shoppe during which we stuffed hot bikinis into a boy's changing room.

Princess Diaries II on the other hand, is highly recommended for happy-ending-cravers. =)

At the Barber's
Patronised some funky hair salon ambushed within a kaleidoscope of cosmetics and accessories shoppe de Isetan in the morning, with my happily chirping Mom beside rambling jovially to an otherwise nonchalant stylist armed with a hefty collection of some 10 combs, 5 snappy scissors + numerous UFOs dangling on his waist. (hell, this is one LONG sentence! void ";"!) After leering at me, and successfully made me feel like a full-time country bumpkin, he beckoned me towards a seat while another attendant promptly dispensed an overdose of Cleo/Her World/Vogue family of magazines in front of me, each of which boasts glaring sex related captions.

"Now my colleague will bestow you with a hair wash." Tearing my eyes away from the juicy headlines, I was thereafter meekly arranged into an awkward position staring into the grinning face of another rather pudgy stylist with symptoms of developing triple chins. "Relaxxx" he cooed. I tensed.

"So, coming for a haircut?" I Duh-ed him.
"Big eyes you have."
"Yours too." I replied mechanically.
Scrub, Squish, Shampoo.
"So, you have a bf?"
Caught off guard, my "big eyes" underwent further enlargement. "er, no." I stammered.
"Aye, neh mind lah, tell me - I won't tell your Mommy."
Now, now. Who does he think he is? My soul mate?
"No." Firm reply. "Sorry to disappoint you, I have none."
"Really?" Inscrutable wry smile. "Really."
"NOOO! I mean yes, don't have." Felt like slapping myself for the slightly loud-volumed outburst.

"Relax! bu4 yao4 zhe4 me4 xiong1!"

Er, wrong move. I made a mental note to kick myself later and attempted change of topic. "Er, how many customers on average do you get here?"
"Oh, about 20 lor, not too many. sometimes 1000, because got you." His sticky voice made me feel belchy. "So, what school are you from?"
"Nanyang Girls."
"Oh all girls, hmmmm. Seen any lesbians?"
Huh!? what is he driving at? This rancid situation was aggravated by a bout of black-eyed-peas ringtone from my pocket - I kicked myself. "Aha! Bf calling!" He ejaculated with an air of triumph.
"Nonono, no bf. My friend. GIRL-friend." naughtiness promptly settles in. "Yah lesbians of course got lah! You haven't seen b4 meh? Neh, here lor." I grinned a lil too widely.
For someone like him, he was fast. "Hah?! you? ... i tell your Mommy."
"Nah, not the need. She knows." I was utterly tempted to say she is one too, but was reminded that lesbian birth-rate is currently atrociously insignificant. I would have to wonder about my own origins then.

Tada! I skipped off to get my hair-cut leaving him jaw-dropped.

2004-11-07T19:36:00.000+08:00

should I air some juicy gossips here? Hmmm.

Wow, hold on -is that really our dear beloved mrs yeoh? I better wear my name-tags from now on.

erps, what lies inside the purple thing?

Argh! why is NO ONE looking at me! :(

er... this dude churned forth like at least 10 books during the 14 days, thick chim ones . Hail to the maybank grinning there.

the guy is licking his plate, no? the other is jealous.

Ho boy, a constipated jie fang jun shu shu tumbling down the great wall - hold on, toilet is near!

this is one stool producing hao han.

Wow, hao hans! one of the rare times when miss yihang posed willingly.

Revenge of the plastics - who can beat that suggestive smile?

heyheyhey! who's the sleeping beauty grinning surreptitiously?

Reality Ahoy!

2 weeks of ? waltzed past, at last I can scrape off layers of stinky fabrics and not step out of the bathroom shivering in delight. Alas, mild symptons of snakey-peel syndrome can also be relieved.

The trip was really a helluva darn one filled with fun, madness, insanity, scandals, most of all, memories. Yesterday night I lay awake in my comfy bed, images of everything flooded back coupled with sharp unbearable spasms of nostalgia. Things in Singapore and Beijing all seem shrouded in mist, both unfamiliar. I was stuck in the transition of time.

I wish I could stop being sentimental and blabber about the fun stuff, I really hate it when I get wrapped up in a cocoon of self-pity, self-reflection, self-musings, and all in one, finding my self-identity.

Soap opera terminated.

2004-10-23T20:38:00.000+08:00

better make this quick.

I love all of you, and will miss you all heaps during my disappearance. Have a nice holiday, and enjoy yourselves!

Ouch, my linguistics is deteoriorating. Nvm. Tata! :)
photos will be uploaded after 2 weeks, can? Sorry! Hoboy, I am gonna start tearing.

2004-10-20T17:37:00.000+08:00

check this out. Helena ya should have this (: Lets hope the producer of the masterpiece, er, take leave from SI tonight!

Gloom
hovering fumes of poisonous gas.
Palpable, suppressing last shreds of ...
Imprisoned soul?
Tired of trying to break free.

Peripheral loss, non -
It's deep, ingrained, etched

Minuscule glimpses of strangled faith,
useless
Inexorable toxin seeping through
Slow. Vindictive.
to forbidden arenas.

The unfathomable tingle lingering
Biting into my skin. Did my pulse slow to a stop?
I can't see clearly anymore.

Carte Blanche - relight me.

Aye! Behold the elusive targets. :)

All right. these dudes kopped like... Don't mention :S

Pretty preeeetty girls - !!! Honey and sweetie pie =)

2004-10-14T23:35:00.000+08:00

I don't Play the Violin. I Sing the Violin. - Maxim Vengerov

Who doesn't love Maxim?
Care to let me know.
I will make sure the next place you are heading to is the stench pouring faecal deposits brimming JohnSuisse? toilet bowl - where you will be staying for quite a while I presume.

Oh btw Melissa, maybe you want to consider trying out the Thames Meditation thingy. Stole my soul, that thingy.

ho boy! Jerry shouldn't be out leh...

Wimbledon reviews

Paul Bettany is Old.
Kirsten Dunst matches up to that. Botox might work wonders
- Ariel, the Quibbler.

Is our dear kirsten so forgetful that she always - always forgets to put on a decent bra?
- Ariel

Despite that, Kirsten has legs that are of commendable seductiveness. Did she immerse them in the perfect-legs-mould before shooting?

"[The] floppiest of the floppy-haired British romantic comedies... Toothless and bland..."
- MaryAnn Johanson, FLICK FILOSOPHER

"For one to drone on about lousy, lumpy tennis is to miss the point of Wimbledon, which is about lousy, lumpy love."
- Wesley Morris, BOSTON GLOBE

"This is the part that will finally make the tall, freckled Bettany (agreed. He is way too tall) a star. He's exquisitely high-strung in a way that women will find madly attractive and men madly agreeable."
- David Edelstein, SLATE

It's strange isn't it. How people can whip out radically different flavours out of the same dish. Oh well, Kirsten fans - (gawks pointedly :) leggy business + lumpy yellow balls. That's about it.

2004-10-10T15:07:00.000+08:00

I feel evil.
I AM evil.
Reading my past diary entries makes me feel Unclean.
All the ugly side of human nature is bared there so damn cruelly,
I feel sick.
Am I really like that?
Yeah, perhaps.
I am dangerous.

And I am lovin' it.

Tuesday

12pm -
Jaccuzi, Sauna, Swimming, sun-tanning mission, iscream crusade.

6pm -
the destruction of all stuff that bears resemblance to exam-related crap i.e. TYS, notes, TBs, ten-stacks of rough-paper (regards to helena's dad, A--ddy! ROFL) New-horizon notebook is too precious to be kept outta sight though. (:

8pm -
Closing ceremony (of my eyes.)

To be con'd.

2004-09-13T19:44:00.000+08:00

I want

10. to get A1.27 for all bloody subjects in EOY
9. to get (presumably) 73 for LRSM. - Nicolson hur. 78.
8. to change my strings and get a proper screaming teacher
7. to go to Shanghai for my cousin's wedding.
6. a Black Belt in Martial Arts.
5. learn Flamenco. Go to Spain and eat Paella.
4. form a jazz band - me drummer.
3. ear holes, Freckles, and frizzy hair.
2. to be effectively Tri-lingual and backpack in Europe using Chinese
1. a Brazillian/Norwegian boyfriend
0. Harvard.

2004-09-04T15:20:00.001+08:00

0909
Unutterables
"As a former bra girl, I have seen more mammary glands than Larry Flynt. (who huh?)

When I was a lass and got thrown out of college for the first time, my parents came up with a plan: I had to get a job.

I applied at a large department store, got called for an interview, and instantly had visions of myself parading through the dressing rooms dispensing invaluable critiques to malnourished, size6 fashion junkies: "lose that caboose! (or vamoose!)" "Are those your upper arms or honey baked hams?" "That little paunch tells me you are in the wrong department, mama. maternity is on the second floor!" But instead, the human-resources director looked at me and said, "what luck! We have an opening in lingerie!"

Bras and girdles. My vision switched gears and reminded me of my first bra fitting when I was 10 and my mother felt that my "lentils" (a scientific term for not-yet-developed bosoms, in case ya wondering.) were beginning to sprout. B4 I know it, I was in a dressing room with an elderly saleswoman's hand cupped over my niblets, categorizing my size as a "grape on its way to a lime." As I tried the bra on, she scooped her fingers inside the cups to make sure that the grapes had ample room to mature into big jugs of wine.

"And one other thing," she garbled as she opened the door to the dressing room, "you will be a woman before you know it, and remember to (de-root those black spaghettis under your arms!)"

After I was hired at the department store, however, i discovered that when adult women enter a lingerie department, they become primitive, unbridled beasts. They see it as a sanctuary where they may absolutely unbutton their shirts, feeling no shame or reserve, and flash a salesperson while saying, "Do you have this bra? (It's such an amazing turn-on!)" They feel that it's completely acceptable to bring 20 bras into a fitting room and leave the 19 that don't fit on the floor and draped over the doors, none of which on a hanger. (They also find it appropriate to approach an 18-year-old bra girl while they are practically naked and ask, "can ya hook me up?")

I also saw men purchasing lurid, sexy teddies (huh?) in 36DD and a petite-size flannel nightgown at the same time, saw women leave their Dirty bras and panties for me to find while they (strut away wearing new ones.)"

Gonzalez, nice one huh! One must take it from a pure biological point of view, alas, entertaining descriptions that sure can plump up your otherwise didactic essays a bit! :)
* -(my crap add-ons not intended to defame the essay.)

strong>Le sensationnel soirée

The last day of the term proves to be fabuleux, with the very first opera of my life lined up after school. Lessons were a breeze, with my adamant brain shutting down and wandering away as usual. Sneaked to Popular ambushing Cocoa during Derek Tan's period to boost my glucose level as usual. A generally routine life. As expected, my bio test is not so satisfactory, yet tolerable. When Berek tried to console us " Hai-er-men, you know that your class average is the highest in the level liao la, quite good lah!" Nai Nai gave an ingenious comment, "FEI4 HUA4". Yeah what could be more true than this. Fei4 hua4. (:

Slacked my afternoon away, sprawled outside the Auditorium with Helena's entrancing recommendation. At five helena finished her yoga-ing, the aftermath of which is a befuddled brain that cannot recall the hiding place of a much sought-after $10 note. Our outfits were à l'air bizarre, perfectly tarnished by a pair of dirty school shoes. The presence of Chen Shan in front of a cubicle made me erupt into bouts of laughter, which marks the start of a hilarious night.

Took a ulu 151, which became the graveyard of half-a-tube of M n Ms. Despite the bus's ulu-ness, we managed to bonk our way to NUS cultural center, a thick tad too early in fact. Nursing growling stomachs we trotted to some even ulu-er so called canteen at NUS, which consisted of ONE magnificent stall selling the ulu-est edibles on Earth. Mon dieu, after consuming numerous POWs (ignoring the banana balls whose ingredients remain a mystery.), we hurried back to the Dome cafe in UCC.

The most unfortunate event of this detour is that we somehow managed to acquire a repulsive giggles-triggering, screechy voice. (which suits Chinese better, as later found out.) This voice seemed to have a life of it's own; as I ordered ice-cream from the wanky waiter. "Can i have a sc~oop of the Cappuccino one~" Drawl~ in a baby voice. The waiter nearly burst out laughing. Next, Helena proceeded with bombshellism, "I want the Rum and Raising one, A BEeeeeeg Scooooop please!" Squeal~ Gosh, I nearly bonked my head into the counter in monstrous hilariousity.

Thanks to my dormant Cashcard, managed to bag a pack of rock-hard-almond-biscotti. We sat reading for ages before some NY silhouettes floated in, each more sexy and demure than the previous, boosting pasta straps and bonky Mini skirts. Ronny even recruited a pair of sharp-toed shiny black leathers which looked awfully... Ahem! :) Gaggling, we clumsily confronted them with the baby voice which rendered most of 'em utterly speechless. "Where is your ne4ge4 ne4ge4! like chicken liddat one!???" Blast. Regina the Manly man + Suwan the Sexy Goddess + Xiangjun the Punky punk.

The above is an extra long and meandering prelude to the opera of utmost
splendeur, the Merry Widow. Hanna Glawari can sing woman. The elaborate, gobsmacking setting and glamorous, exotic costumes were absolutely flawless. Not to mention the resplendent orchestra gathered cosily in the orch pit, producing soul-rendering tunes. Really, sometimes the most simple and sweet music can give you the best satisfaction, leaving you in a sweet perfect 'lil world of your own. The others i shant mention, cause I am currently unable to pull my bum outta the sweet lil world...

2004-08-26T19:43:00.000+08:00

31 August

There is a sense of loss. Palpable, something deep inside, that cannot be explained, yet there, certainly. (other than my windbreaker though, the second loss of the year) I dunno what I am living for, everything about myself bumps down to something surreal, fragments of unidentifiables. I dunno who am I living for... myself? Nope, I've more or less lost myself. I dunno what I'm doing, under the shadow of this hypocritical world, under everybody's judgement, everybody's utmost high expectations. Have I taken too much from people that I am doomed to be paying back all these while by surrendering my own identity?

As much as I hate to ask, what's after death? I am so disappointed in myself, my stupid tendency to get all boozed up. Perhaps it's because the stress of the previous weeks is clearing up, revealing a blank future road that is more than daunting. I am on a journey to nowhere, but time does not stop for me to decide my destination.

My angst tastes like...

Lime
Find your angst's flavor

Sour yet intriguing, your angst is of the romantic variety. You probably spend a good portion of your time daydreaming about that one person you want, how your first date would be, how you'd love to do certain things, and above all how everlastingly happy you would be together. While there's nothing wrong with this, you know that it's unhealthy to spend too much time dreaming and not enough time in reality, and to build lofty goals and fantasies that no actual person could ever hope to achieve. Try to center yourself and cut back on time spent in your fantasy life; you may find out all that experience creating romantic moments has made you quite the charmer if you would only try!

~Er, what the rubbish.

~End of a Glorious Era~

Heya, I am still Alive! ALIVE! Congratulate me leh, for maneuvoring my way outta gates of Hades...

So much has happened. it feels strange to go back to the start (back to when the sun-the stars-the moon all aligned!), so I shall embark on a whubby new start!

Ho boy, Olympics gonna end already! Siao! waited for 4 bloody years, and now its gonna be over. Flippin-bleepin-philipino maido! Argh! Sorri, a bit too much of exclamation marks all arounda, !!!!!!!!!!! Ar, Gymnastics! I need to watch! But not those disgusto males ones who has absolutely too much muscles.

Yoz, Au revoir baby grando! Erm hullo lousy cello.

Btw, Singapore Idol is startin' to rock a bit. Especially Olinda, she is so darn shiok!!! Gives me the utter grooves! I am gonna make sure that she boozes into top 3. Some bian3 though, such as Benjamin Eio(eeks!), who is got a puke-rendering voice and over bouncy feet. His hand is always massaging his own stomach, or is it to make sure that no spare-tyres have sprouted over the course of his performance? Dwayne Dwinders with his name, CMI. He looked absolutely Pretty boy and useless, as though I can bash him up and make him into Ditto Dunkaroos. Oh well, the grubbily Stupid orange peely Dick resembles a dinghy Ah-Wayne.

~Stacey's Mom has got it going on, shes all I wanted I waited so long~ Groove on babes... (:

2004-07-30T22:23:00.000+08:00

I am under stress.

major stress.

let me enlighten you on the perfect ingredients to brew a cauldron of ever so effective self-service-suffocating device.

Chemistry.
Math test.
Chinese test.
E-lit test wannabe.(as portrayed by satay cordially and vindictively.)
Physics test
Biology killer.

Chemistry product and presentation. (having serious aligning probs, as usual)
Math portfolio.(numerous fake reflections on my lousy pieces of work. Cringe. Grimace.)
English Porfolio. Forget it.
Biology multi media webby project cum fake portfolio.

(At this point I must stress that the teachers, or rather, PORTFOLIO grazers, have certainly developed a disgusting knack for reading fake reflections, and seeing your worksheets neatly and primly sitting atop each other. I personally believe that there is no better way to waste time.)

Physics SIA. Supposedly doing on some astronomy thingy. Darned fart.
Japanese Oral presentation.

A nice plump 2000-word essay on Bach Beethoven and Ginastera. Loads of vomit rendering research. Must go check out the NEW GROVE music dictionary which allegedly consists of about twenty thick volumes.
Practise piano until about 12. Any further will result in Finger necrosis.

Atop this mountain mole hill of defacation of coliforms, I have to be lectured by parents, nagged and gonked, slaughtered and humilated by mdm Fang, accused by Mr Sze, wither under my own guilty conscious of wasting any single second, as i am doing now.

By the way, I have just calculated, this one friggin booze of a LRSM cost about 1800 bucks. Ang Mohs are ex, aren't they.

2004-07-16T21:22:00.000+08:00

Versace: Oww, the essence of haute! You are
flashy, daring, and dramatic! You believe in
beauty above practicality and view fashion as
art.

What fashion designer fits you
brought to you by

Any suggestions for funkay movies to watch? Seems that my wallet is complaining about its bloatedness. (:

2004-06-30T18:16:00.000+08:00

Mrs Seah-Tay Hui Yong

Spellbound, by the haunting charm
of Sacred felines from Ancient Egypt
Eyes gleaming glinting
Perhaps glowering
in relentless pursuits

To Dissect, Analyse.

Yes, bouncing on the balls of her feet
briskly, an air of determination, moving through
the campus of NY,
is our dear Mrs Seah-tay hui yong

Driving up in her blissfully grubby flaming red jeep
(my dream car)
emerging
clad in a bizzare, Ganesha-themed top
wrist adorned with Ganeshe-inspired Hindu Henna

Every sq inch of her
radiating confidence, wit
a light yet unmistakable hint of arrogance
brimming with wry humour + caustic sarcasm.

A thirst for philosophy
A strange nonchalance for Christianity

whips out a dog-eared planner
insrutable scribbles...

"Meng Tian."

Snaps me out of my reverie, hypnotized eyes regained life.
I blinked.

"mengtian." I squirmed.
"This is the umpteenth time I've told you.
your writing reminds me of a bimbotic blonde."

I shrugged. A fake look of concern
crept onto my nontheless Innocent face.

She stared.

"Incorrigible."

I can't sleep. Had wanted to concoct something funni outta triple science and Derek tan perhaps. ended up thinking about Satay. Wrote this under a torchlight in my covers. There goes. Whubby eh? :)

2004-06-15T23:43:00.000+08:00

Okie. Lemme give ya all some gooby problems to ponderosa about...

IBM Interview Question:

There is this room. Inside there are three lights. Outside there are three switches each controlling one of the lights inside. If you are only given one grubby chance to hobble into the room, what would ya do to find out exactly which switch controls which light?

(No outside equipments allowed. No video cameras either. Anyways ya neede hobble in first to place the video camera, then go in for a second time to retrieve it, so that's two times in total.)

Now a mathy one to block your boozy brain.

(a-x)(b-x)(c-x)........(z-x)= ?

Have fun trying!

Yo-Yo Ma Silk Road Project

Wow another night at the Esplanade...Is it my imagination or is it that I have been going to Esplanade too goobily often? Must brace myself not to drool anymore at outside e Haagen Daaz Shoppe. I mean, must splurge no matter what next time I go! Ice cream is made to be transported down your oesophagus. Not to be Goggled at and coated in Gooey Saliva!!!

Anyways today just got severely bashed by Sze Again... All my BLOODY fault! I am such a worthless slug. What am I doing slobbering at the front desk as a BLOODY PRINCIPAL Player? And he wanna me to form a QUARTET with xiang jun Britney spears sommore. WORK on us. Gosh I am gonna stuff my Gooby head down the toilet bowl. I am just too used to my solo Piano stuff. I will NEVER learn to listen to the other sections. I always play on my own BLOODY instinct, not that it's extra keen or anything...

I really hope we won't blow it on Friday. Please don't let me blow it. I repent: I am not practising hard enuff. Yes I am a LAZY WOOZY SWAYING DORK. Dear Heavenly Father please give me a CHANCE! Please forgive moi. Can?

Friday seems too near. I don't wanna it to slip away. Like that.

Okay back to the concert tonight. Lemme tell you. It's a WHUBBY FULL HOUSE. no house can be fuller than that. All those Bitchy looking ladies wrapped in shawls of revolting color combination and putting on a demure elegant front, sipping cocktails and Diet cokes. What am I blabbering about? All the wimsy worthless details. Oh yeah! Yo-yo Ma rocks more than a giant YOYO! The way he plays man... Montagnana from Venice and Davidoff Stradivarius. The uncanning unnerving ease with which he slides up to mebbe 10000000th position. How he sways about ready to fall off the lil stupid platform they have given him (as all cello soloists in the past)Makes it seem like he is on display! So CRUDE! He plays vibrato without e thumb behind to support! Can ya believe it!?!? And his fingers are so damn long. I must invent a Finger Elongation Surgeryfor all hopeless-es like moi...

Then again I must express my utmost disppointment at the concert Programme. Remember! Lee Xian long is also there! How can they give such a...er...Programme! Music composed by Bright Sheng? The moment I peeped at the programme book this Horrid feeling of Apprehension swept over. And I was right. Never trust Bright sheng to compose something that a normal homo sapien can understand. Obviously Yoyo ma and Blue Water that sort are not NORMAL lah!

Okay here is what this Yoyo ma did. He scrounged for some Pimpy Pipa and Sooby Sheng from dunno where and planted em right in the midst of such beautiful instruments. Oh! before I go on, I must say that the OBOES are too loud! how to hear the poor double basses pizz when those Winds and Bras are blowing their heads of innocently back there? And there is one part where the trombones are just doing glissandos blindly! all you can hear is like constipated dudes tearing toilet roll. Okay next fact. CHINESE INSTRUMENTS don't fit. they just don't! No matter how creative, how novel how noble the piece is, Chinese don't mess with West. There goes. Don't you agree! SAY YOU AGREE! I know those are virtuosos themselves but please don't block my view of Yoyo ma leh. Gosh I am getting mean. Sorri. No offence to Avid Chinese music and Winds and Bras lovers. I am only saying this in the context of my beloved Yoyo ma... PArdon moi! Sumimasen!

Okay long enuff I guess. must get back to working out those stupid pizza-cato parts. Oh btw, crapper reckons that i have a fan club in chicken house.

LMAO!

2004-06-03T21:00:00.000+08:00

The Quest for Self-discovery

Yay! Guess what? I have jusy experienced the FLOW!
Yes it is the FLOW indeed. It happened. Yes it did.

I am devoid of myself. No control yet complete control
In awe and wonderment,
Music Oozes

Bach's Chromatique Fantasia, the arpeggios parts are totally fantastic... I do not will my fingers anymore...they just runs, bringing out the mystified melody. Lovely beyond words. Strangely I've always stumbled in this parts. Only Shun hong can do it fantastucke! I don't quite understand him, he seems kinda inert all the time only uttering mono-syllables while I am yabbering away with all my might, but his long haunting fingers always seem to work magic... hoho. I reckon the only thing he can't do as whammi as moi is the hard crazy pounding 20th century pieces. I can feel him crumbling under the lack of emotions, but just plain, wild rhythms, oozing adrenaline. I really think that the danzaz Argentina is a really SEXY composition, if ya get what I mean, which is an OBVIOUS NO

But thinking about it, my favourite music is still Romantic ones. Late Romantic compositions has this unfathomable attraction to me. Like Tchaikovsky. His The Seasons is really an enchanting collection. I especially lOVE Mai: Les Nuits se mai, and Juin: Barcarolle I just get the flow everytime I play 'em. I got it just now outta 'em. Such haunting melancholy, soulfulness, is nothing Ginestera and Poulenc or whatever 20th century composers trying to outdo each other by composing music weirder and wilder than ever before, can achieve. It's SOUL He is baring his SOUL right there, for me to feel, touch, engulf, palpable and seductive...

There are times when I totally drunk on music. I will listen to the recording over and over again, devouring the loveliness and marrow of each piece... the last piece I remember is Grieg's Piano Concerto Such explosive beauty, such wild untamed Norwegian fiery... Grieg really rocks man. His ONlY piano concerto. Timeless. I've tried it, but it's totally un-playable... haha thanks to melissa who lovingly lent me the 56-page score to photocopy. Well, I guess I will just get th FlOW out of listening to the recording then... Next year...yep! I will TACKLE it!

Piano. Looking back, it's been there with me for, NINE Years. 9 years. Gosh. There are times when I just feel like banging on it and crashing it out of my sight cause of numerous failed attempts at difficult passages... or gets MERCILESSLY shamed my Fang Lao Shi. She has the ability to make me Plunge into ABYSS, believe it or not. But then, I still love it. Dearly. I don't know how to describe the Love...It's...

I never felt the same kind of love and passion for cello. I dunno why. I do love the soulful sounds of this wonderful instrument, but then... forget it. Time rubs in. Time you EVIL. Oh but then I really LOVE, absolutely adore Yoyo-ma's Tango of Piazzolla That is simply SIN. Trust me.

Ways to feel the FLOW:
1. making musicke
2. feeding on musicke
3. enjoying others making musicke.

Wheebo! enuff blabbered. Yammered. Whatever. Oh anyways warn ya pple reading this, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban Sucks All the stupid scene changes, the lousy ever-unchanging expression plastered on dear harry's face, disgusting werewolf, just don't add up. But watch it anyways. If you have 7++ to spare. Lightens your drooping wallet.

Ortus Rocks! Haha. Helena you must learn the Viola! The Flow...Hmmmm.

Look into my eyes
What d'ya see?
Dark brown, or hazel?

I CANNOT SEE.

I still can't see. I can't feel. can't see.

2004-06-01T15:50:00.000+08:00

Aloha Holidays!

There it is
sauntering into view
making an unnoticed entrance...
Madame HOLIDAYS.

Yay the class party was so fabulously gobsmackin' fun! I love it man... Dixon rox (gymming away)... haha. I love all the racist jokes, though I think the Hindus in the context should be replaced by... PARENTS.

Jeez. Parents.

I can't understand them and they can't understand me. they pretend that they understand me without really understanding me. I don't want to be understood and don't bother to understand them. There it goes... the vicious cycle of junki parent-teen relationship.

Yes ya probably won't believe it, but I surrendered my dear precious handphone. Yes. my HANDPHONE I just hope that I can survive without it... you pple can still message me if ya wanna, till i get to see my beloved hp again, which spells no exact date...

I will be stripped of all entertainment.

2004-05-24T21:50:00.000+08:00

Bloody hell. Has been soooooooo long since such a woozziely wonderous movie rocked my mundane, jaded world.

I really love it. It is the best. THE BEST Serioulsy, what other words can possibly describe it? It is brilliant, despite the wimpy attempts to copy and paste all the warty warriors and slumbering ships, the so called 1000 fleet.

How can anyone get such a atrociously damnmy good brother? How come I don't have? Paris seriously DON'T deserve Hector at all! He is just a wimpy useless womaniser plus rubbishy archer. He should be put away and suffocated with dung! Plus Helen is not so pretty after all, and she is the root of all the bloddy probs, she and her runaway bleepin desires...JEEZ!

I dunno what to say about Archilles though. I do sincerely admire him to my graveyard, but mebbe he is not my type. Too rash. A bit ego. Dunno. Director loved his role too much, but I have to admit that Brad Pitt does have a nice butt. Jeez. I can't believe that came out of my mouth!

Whatever. I am totally TOTALLY swept away by this. Lotsa stuff to ponder about, really. Love vs Loyalty. Which one would ya choose? :)

Anyways, if anyone reading this has not bleepin watched the movie, go do it NOW. NOW. NOW

2004-05-18T21:50:00.000+08:00

Woo hoo!

I hereby proclaim Mademoiselle Helen*a's burning fiery desire to join the Abosolutely Major Ampicilliny, Booby, CMI, Dogmatic, Ego-swarming, Funky, Gob-smackin', Horrendously Humongous, Intriguing, Jacuzziny, King-kongy, Lipids-brimmin', Money-faced, Notoriously nosey, Orh-bi-sai, Pompous, Quackin, Resplendent, Stunningly Sipid, Tabes-dorsalis-infected, Unscrupulously vagabondy, Wonderously xena-like yabbering zeolotty Chinese High Family.

Hoho! Let's just march over and join 'em in their Bright neon Orangy red Precipitatey Uniform...haha! Anyways, When is our class gathering? Btw, Troy is this sat hor...

Flunko Flunko! Jeez... Can Anyone believe the Blatant existence of a Supposed Homo Sapien who is capable of getting 97 for Japanese? If you don't, you are advised to.

People around are really getting scary. I shall just take 2 Half gramme SOMA tablets for now... I really think I am pneumatic! (you will never find this wordy in the dictionary!) :)

2004-05-12T19:13:00.000+08:00

Ho boy!

Another ultra stressed day over...finished most of my decaying pile of homework today. Our dear class is addicted to mass copying nowadays, esp PHYSCIS. Like nobody understands what Marko Shone is blabbering about in lessons at all, at most we'll squeal with delight at his latest addition of Max's snapshots. Well, After school everybody juz hobble nonchalantly over to my table to viviously, blatantly, or surreptitiously snatch away rare copies of duly completed worksheets by guai kais, and...copy 'em. Some dudes are not easily satisfied by one wimpy copy of worksheet, they need more SOLID EVIDENCE, preferably obtained from Cheryl's perfect copy. JeeZ!

Can we ever learn like that? Not that our physics, or rather, MY physics, sux big time already. Whatever. I am pretty sick of dudes coming up and saying,"Oh you har! So clever leh! Never study, everyday bo chap like that also can get SO high! So xian4 mu4 you3 mei2 you3?"

"MEI2 YOU3!!!"

I mean, my results are really slacking nowadays. I feel slacky every single day and there is basically nothing to look forward to in my life. I have no passion currently, which is SO DAMN BLEEPIN' And really, I AM NOT CLEVER... Ask my dad. He will tell you the truth. The only thing I am proud of myself is that I can finish science practicals real fast. REAL fast, I mean it. But take note, Fast doesn't spell MARKS, which I am seriously lackin' now...

Seriously. I am a LOSER you3 mei2 you3? Please...my piano is really damned sucky like a pile of rancid BULLSHIT. I am NOT JOKING. The exasperating thing is that everyone reckons that I am a WheeZ in music or something. I tell you - I AM NOT. I have no technique, I can't even play that fucking bunch of triplets properly. FOR FIVE Bloody months i have been slaving over that Triplets thing and I STILL can't get it. FORGET IT Sometimes I just sit there and lash out on my BLOODY fool of a left hand. It is a useless dollop shit, PERIOD!

Okay okay. I know I am getting a bit pessimistic, okay, very pessimistic here. I really didn't mean to. Ho boy! ... Stop it! you are NOT gonna cry. Jeez! I told you NOT to cry! What the -

I hope the term pass fast. I need the Holidays to perk me up. not that it is holidays in the real sense of the word anyways. I am really looking forward to our concert in june, really. Please come...but don't fade away...

Thank you everyone, I really loved you all! This is really like a real diary entry here, that's all my feelings, naked and true. I dunno why I am doing this, but mebbe just to pour out all that has accumulated in my heart and needs to be exhaled. I don't really feel better now 'cause my prob is not solved yet, my jaded-ness and messy life, with no destination nor destiny, but at least...I dunno at least what. I love you dad, I love you mom. Be with me always.

Dear heavenly Daddy, are you there listenin'?

-caught Necrotisin' Fasciitis. No Cure.-

2004-05-07T21:26:00.000+08:00

~The taste of UTTER Agony~

What's agony anyone?
let me tell you.
it's a damned *bleepin throbbing foot.
I don't even know how i zhong4 this darn thing. it's like last Wed i wake up then got a bit of teeny pain, so I dismissed it as usual. then on Sat it suddenly burst into full Evil, making me cringe with painful delight every one of my step. Jeez. What the rubbish! and like the whole week it din even subside a bit, instead, blossomed into a mighty swell. Goodness. God please help me recover soon!

Anyways Jap is finally over. Phew! but nasty homework is piling up there as usual. Chem journal man. OnlyThreepathetic entry. Anyone in the same PATHETIQUE situation? mebbe Beethoven.

oh btw Thomas is so damn funni. I wanna abduct him and plant him in my house. Dying from fits of laughter. Darn.

Sports day tml. Sigh. Hope it will be fun. like how fun? What talking me. I miss Wushu. sharks. Get a grip my damned ankle! If you swell somemore I will have to personally flatten you!

Wow one last word. Samuel is so scary.

2004-05-03T11:54:00.000+08:00

Calling all PARTY Animals!
There will be super Party held at the start of the JUNE HOLIDAYZ!
It will be major funky, with lotsa music and dance and FUN! Trust me. Turn over my house if ya wanna.
All those who are interested please register with Xiao tiantian from 3-3.
Come prepared with one item though. Can be anything. An outta tune song, a hippy dance, or a crappi joke, or a Creepy story, or you can come bang on my baby grand if ya love loud pianos!
More suggestions for the party will be sobbingly welcomed.

PS. This party is strictly restricted from parents. otherwise suited for dudez of all ages. Yes. If you are a PARENT, keep away.

2004-05-01T22:16:00.000+08:00

My dear Heavenly Daddy,

Please save me.
Stop me from having so many nasty, *bleepin* infatuations.
I can't go on like this.
Please save me.

In your precious name, Amen

2004-05-01T16:17:00.000+08:00

Xiao Tian Tian Assumes the lotus position.

Please don't be mad anymore. I don't understand why you are so pissed. And please don't use Fuckin like a *bleepin* shit. You don't degrade yourself just like that. Please. It's tiring for you and everyone. Forget the *bleeping* shit.

Xiao Tian tian assumes the fighting stance

Lets see...
What movies are hot?

Troy
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Az Helena you better not get lost before this one comes out... :)
Spider man II Um, Tobey Mcguire should get rid of his double chin!
Shrek 2 Yo Eddie Murphy rocks man! Squeezes donkee's ass
Van Helsing what the heck!~
Cat babe Halle berri kicks ass~
Alien vs Predator Wow. Good combi.

Orlando Bloom getting a bit sick. (Helen of Troy don't be mad!) Josh Hartnett Die hards please tag. Haha. Kaixin. We are on the same boat! Cheeyang's art rocks! (helen you get what i mean!) Shao ba should quit his four letter word frenzy. WW I love your gossips. Shaun you really rock. I don't understand how you can be so damn pro. Jeez.

xiao tian tian slashes the computer

2004-04-28T19:20:00.000+08:00

Everytime

Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way
I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song is my sorry

Ohhhh

At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

After all...
After all...

Sobz. So ghostly enchanting. Sorri Britney I don't hate you that much anymore. Dudes, go listen to the song. Your deepest senses will be touched.

2004-04-27T21:19:00.000+08:00

Aphrodite/Eros

?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

2004-04-24T14:42:00.000+08:00

I am going to SCREAM Seriously I am going to scream my lungs out, let em drop on the ground and wither!

Can you believe it? My STUPID computer hanged again and there I was in the middle of writing an entry and then, all wiped out. Swish... gone. Yeah. onometopoeia rox. What the onometopoeia for hurtling gigantic boxes at my computer?

Okay. Patience, xiao tian tian. don't let down your ancestors who spent half their lifetime pondering about how to be patient. Now let me recount what i have wrote. ultimate test of memory. Yeah here goes.

Biology

My dear beloved Biology. I slaved over you. I gave all my nights to you. Yet... you give me CRAP!!!!!!

Yes indeed. Let's see...math test loomin in near future... (when I say near, i mean NEAR) still can't make any lame sense outta trigonometry. Japanese mid year shiken looms a bit further...but that's still a big fat lump there. Dunno how to get rid of it. Pluck it clean outta my view! stop blocking my bright future! Well, i should just forget about all my studies stuff and slack all day long. i sucked at every thing. EVERYTHING how did I dare to dream about acing my Bio test when since the start of the year, i have done nothing at all in bio class other than serious VEGGIN around and asking lame and unintelligent questions? No wonder Derek Tan wanna kill me. in a futile attempt to kiss my own cheek. teach me how to do it.

You see, now I can't rmb what i wrote previously. All the signs of rapid aging is gonna drive me absolutely nuts. Oh okay. Something about Strings. Allow me to quote xiao tian tian : All the people out there. Listen up. Lend me your ears rather. Don't worry you wil get it back. All the people there you MUST come to our Strings concert on June the 18th. I repeat. June the 18th not friday the 13th. Whether you are pregnant, lactating, (in the unfortunate case of which you are advised to consume more calcium in prevention to get knobbly knees.) on a diet, going on a hot date, making out in a stinky room, mugging for your tests, or wasting your time acting BIMBO. YOU BETTER COME. geddit? Good.

quoting finished.

Well, well, well. I have to say that HCJC chinese orchestra rocked big time! Wow so nice. Scrummily intriguing. ESP the drums. I am gonna strangle that Johnathan guy whatsoever. He deserved to be put away for making me fal in love...with his DRUMz.

Okay then. I guess i should just stop here. Wasted half an hour again. Conx my head. Not that I am not stupid enuff. Jeez!

Where is the love?

2004-03-27T23:00:00.000+08:00

Oh the eyes. Kills.

*LiberTango*

BRAVO NYSE!

Taufik

YES!

Wimbledon reviews

Mrs Seah-Tay Hui Yong

Have fun trying!

Yo-Yo Ma Silk Road Project

LMAO!

LiberTango